Ok, so I am throwing my original post out of the proverbial window and going with a recommendation topic from a friend. Ever walk into a place that was so intimidating that you automatically felt defeated? Ever face a big project, a new experience, that left you deflated instead of inflated? Ever step into a difficult conversation already feeling like your point of view didn’t matter? Ah, the deep dread of defeat.
I feel this way every time… I walk into Home Depot.
I know, but I am so serious!!! HAHA. For some Home Depot is like a dream, but once I step beyond those automatic doors, I encounter a whole unfamiliar world, where I have to ask a Home Depot associate where EVERYTHING is. I feel so co-dependent it’s pathetic. Every project spirals into another project that is so overwhelming to me. I’d rather put IKEA furniture together! If I buy one thing, I need another thing, and then another thing, and then I walk out with a bunch of things that I don’t know how to work! Or, I just walk away intimidated, I don’t even start.
This happened to my friend recently too… so I just want to put it out there, I’m not alone (actually, she asked a guy one question and he made a dumb comment of how she should, “stick to makeup.” Let’s not get into that)… Is this real life?
But how many of us live life already defeated… like me walking into Home Depot? Before we actually know the outcome, before we even try, before our feet touch the ground in the morning, our mindset is on defeat default.
There is no such thing as a problem free life. I know, I wish I could give it to you! As much as the media pushes it, as much as it seems like other people are hashtag: “living their best life”- everyone faces problems, trials, scares, frustrations, and insecurities. It rains on the just and the unjust alike, but take heart… 🙂 God promises that if you lean on him, trust in him, he will give you the strength to overcome. Let’s take this one step at a time. Next time you feel defeated, think about these points:
1. The choice is yours: I know some people will argue this but no matter your environment, past, what people have done to you, what people will do to you, you have the choice to not live defeated. You can project blame on others, but that will get you no where. Let knowing you have the right to choose, EMPOWER you. TRUTH BOMB: you have already been given the victory. You just need to believe it and get it in your bones! Fight the feeling of defeat from victory, not for it.
2. Remember who you really are: We love to attach our wins and loses to who we are. Yes, they shape us, but they do not define us. So let me remind you today, that you are forgiven, saved by grace, justified, a new creation, strong, wise, loved, and lovable. You are a leader, a light in the darkness, unique, and created for a purpose. No matter my hang-ups, flaws, skills, or gifts, when I connect with who I really am, it’s hard for me to stay in a defeated state.
3. Live it even when you don’t feel it: I don’t want to call you a negative Nancy, because I know a Nancy and I like her. So don’t be that person that complains and only sees the bad all the time. I mean, don’t live in la-la-land, but settle that you will speak life over yourself, your family, your friends, your circumstances, etc. A chain reaction happens when our thoughts turn into words into actions and into a life style.
4. You will win some and you will lose some: Come to grips knowing that some things, no matter how hard you try, will not work out the way you planned. And then, there will be some things that will. But don’t allow one loss, a negative moment in time, spawn into “this is going to be for the rest of my life.” Don’t allow a series of hardships to deter you from picking yourself up and starting again. Reframe the way you look at what you view as “negative.” It way just be pushing you towards your next win. You keep a positive outlook when you keep your head up.
5. Try your best: At the end of the day, if you can say in your heart of hearts that you genuinely tried your best, let that be enough. Do your best work. H. Jackson Brown Jr. once said, “if you’re doing your best, you won’t have time to worry about failure.” Don’t they say, Rome wasn’t built in a day?” Cool, you’re life isn’t either!
6. You CAN do this: You are more equipped than you think. You are more than a conquerer. Know that whatever you come up against, you were led there and God has given you everything you need to rise above, when you put him first. Persevere and push through.
SCRIPTURE REFERENCES THAT HELP
Romans 8:37 // John 15:5 // 1 John 5:4 // 2 Timothy 2:15 // Deuteronomy 20:4 // John 16:33 // Ephesians 6:10 // Proverbs 18:21